Intelligent Being Nice
Here on newground a lot of the stuff I hear (I listen but hardly ever vote or comment) has a lot of techno and is pretty straightfoward putting steps into a sequencer.
Not that that can't be any good...but I like to hear some experiment.
In my opinion you succeeded pretty wel in creating an atmosphere that has some depth. The "gayness" melody and the "heavy breathing" give a nice contast.
However it goes on a bit too long and I think in the end you just started playing with effects to try and come to end.
So don't give up making music.....